My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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