I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I hope mine doesn't look like that
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
