I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
50% drunk capacity currently
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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