I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Randomize