So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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