So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
