drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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