the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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