well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
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