I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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