sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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