oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
