I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
Randomize
