My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
