He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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