Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
