p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Randomize
