They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
