U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
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