I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Tell her she can't have a vagina
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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