He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Randomize
