I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
