At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
