My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
