Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
