yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
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