Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
