One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
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