This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Randomize
