Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
There r osticjed everywhere
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
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