Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
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