PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize
