if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
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