I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Can vaginas get frostbite?
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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