Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Randomize
