can we get nightvision for the apartment?
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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