so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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