you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
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