question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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