I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
