How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
