You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Randomize
