Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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