just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize