I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Randomize
