Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I just forgot I was standing up.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize