oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Randomize
