i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
