Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
