then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
